


The Haole says....

by Keenir



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Creole, Gen, Hawaiian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-21
Updated: 2010-12-18
Packaged: 2017-10-12 02:04:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/119578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Keenir/pseuds/Keenir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny asks to learn Hawaiian.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **Warnings:** any and all misuse and misunderstanding of Hawaiian and other languages, is my own fault; please be gentle in pointing it out.
> 
>  **Reference:** _Bastard Tongues: a trailblazing linguist finds clues to our common humanity in the world's lowliest languages_ by Derek Bickerton.
> 
> this has been crossposted to [](http:)Hawaii_5_0_fic.

It was on their second day in the new office, though technically their third day as a team, that Danny sat down, handed a soda to the others, and said, "Okay."

"What were you guys talking about without me?" Kono asked her cousin and McGarrett.

"Took the words right out of my mouth," McGarrett said.

"Can you repeat the question?" Chin asked Danny.

"I've been thinking it over," Danny said. "And since I'm going to be moving in here -"

"Not in this office, you're not," McGarrett said. "What happened to your apartment?"

"My apartment's fine, thank you very much. No, I'm going to stay here in Hawaii. So I figure I should learn the language while I'm here."

"Cool," Kono said.

Chin and McGarrett looked at one another, nodded, then looked back at Danny. "Repeat after me," Chin said.

Danny nodded. "Okay."

"Do you want fries with that?" Chin enunciated.

"Funny," Danny said. "Real laugh riot. I mean I want to learn Hawaiian. More than just poi and luau," he added quickly before anyone could rib him with that next.

"Oh we'll teach you."

"Why does this not sound like a good idea?" Danny asked, glaring at McGarrett.

"It won't hurt," Kono said.

Chin coughed before Danny could think of anything to say to that.

"Fine," Danny said. "I was going to just ask if you could suggest some classes or teachers, but if you're sure you don't mind."

In what Danny assumed was Hawaiian, Chin muttered something as he waved one hand. "Not a problem," he said next.

"Just don't call be - don't use that other name, and we'll get along fine."

"What other name?" Kono asked.

"Danno," said McGarrett.

"Are you doing this delib- You're doing this deliberately, aren't you?" Danny said. "I ask you not to say that name, I tell you not to say that name."

"Who's the name for?" Chin asked.

"His daughter," McGarrett said.

"Ah," Kono said, as though that answered a question she had been wondering all along.

"What?" Danny asked. "A man's allowed to have kids."

"As our aunties happily remind Chin every chance they get," Kono said.

"Relax," Chin said to Danny.

"Oh I'm relaxed. I just don't like sticking out like a sore thumb if I can help it. And I figure this'll mean I'm not a..." and looked through the reciepts and notes he carried. "A hay olé?"

Kono, Chin, and McGarrett looked at one another a moment. "I think it was Spanish," McGarrett said.

"A _haole_ ," Kono corrected politely. "A foreigner. Used to just mean a White."

"But by the time we finish, you'll be speaking Hawaiian like a native," Chin said.

"Thanks," Danny said.

Before Danny could say more, McGarrett assured him, "It'll be mostly painless."

Still talking to Chin, Danny said, "Fair warning, though - it's been a long time since I tried learning another language. Hopefully I can clear out the cobwebs in my brain so -" stopping when he saw McGarrett and Chin smiling. "What?"

"Here's your first lesson," Kono supplied helpfully. "In Creole, _to cobweb_ is a verb."


	2. O'api

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danny's at the end of his rope...but he does have something to cheer him up: something the others don't know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Passing spoilery mention of an occurance in _Palekaiko_.
> 
> The information about the word "o'api" comes from the book _The Natural history of Unicorns_ by Chris Lavers.

One day, Danny came into work with a 'do not disturb me unless its a very definate emergency' face on, and plopped himself in a chair at the main table.

"I'm going to say you're not having a good morning," Kono said.

"Got it in one," Danny said.

"What's up?" McGarrett asked.

"I give up," Danny said. "I just...I give up. I'm a _haole,_ damn straight. I know it, you know it, the whole archipelago knows it. I'm _haole, yabanji, gaijin,_ every frikkin' name you can think of. I'm an o'api here." _As I said before, I don't fit in, and it wasn't ever my intent to fit in._

Steve and Chin looked at each other before looking back at Danny. "A what now?" McGarrett asked.

"An o'api," Danny said.

"That's not a word."

"Course it is. It's a noun. How can you say it's not a word?"

"Because it isn't," McGarrett said.

"Says you. Says Mr. I've been all over the world and shot people in every one of those spots."

"You're thinking of 'travel the world, meet interesting people, and shoot them,'" Chin said.

"He probably did that too," Danny said. "But I can't believe none of you have ever heard of an o'api."

"I think I have," Chin said. "Malia used to talk about them."

"Really?" McGarrett asked. "How could she do that when -"

"They exist," Danny said. "You denying the truth, will not make them suddenly stop existing."

"They don't exist, Danno," McGarrett said.

"Then what did Step-Stan get Grace for a present the last time they went to the Panaewa Zoo? Granted, it was stuffed and about a foot tall."

Steve frowned.

 _Time for some things me and Grace picked up._ "Cousin of the giraffe, really long tongue, striped legs, fur like peach fuzz," Danny said.

"Ah, you mean an Okapi," McGarrett said.

"Well sure, if you want to be a haole about it."

At the very least, Kono and Danno were amused at McGarrett's reaction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Okapi" is how European explorers learned to pronounce it - from the neighbors of the peoples who actually knew the animal; said neighbors hardened the initial consonant to make it easier for for them to pronounce, then they taught it to the Europeans.


	3. Driving words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A drabble. Danny with a headache, knows three words that silence a room. (gen)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I confess I cheated - the phrase was from [Omniglot.com](http://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hawaiian.php)'s page of "Useful Hawaiian Phrases."

Danny's head had hurt all day, from the first phone call of the morning - from Rachel, on his case about where Grace's spare toothbrush was - to right now, in Five-0 HQ, where Steve McGarrett was in full-on SEAL God Of War mode. And talking waaaay too fast for Danny's taste. _They're in league together. I just know they're working together to drive me insane._

 _Danny noticed that, while Chin and Kono were nodding from time to time, they otherwise weren't moving - no calling up data, no taking notes, not anything. _Grreat, super-SEAL's going too fast for his own friends too.__

Danny would have taken a breath, but suspected it wouldn't help his headache. So he unleashed one of the few Hawaiian phrases he was more than halfway decent in pronouncing correctly:

 _"E ʻōlelo mālie."_

Steve shut up.

Nobody said a word.

After a few long silent seconds, Danny said, "What?, I asked you to slow down, not to stop. Although."

"Although?" McGarrett asked.

"Yes, although. Although it _does_ explain your driving."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> E ʻōlelo mālie = Please speak slowly.

**Author's Note:**

> *blinks* the Aunties are invading my brain, it seems. :)


End file.
